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The 1st Annual One Man Awards
Written By: J. Michael Neal

Ever wonder what would happen if one person decided to hand out awards left and right to whatever they felt like? Well, wonder no more, because here it is, the first annual One Man Awards. Don’t agree with something? Think I was right on the money? Have your own categories and awards to give? Drop a line and let me know!

The Audio Awards

Best Musical Score – Medal of Honor Frontline (Xbox)

The game wouldn’t be half as good if it was played in silence.

Runner Up – Hitman 2: Stealth Assassin (Multi)

Best Music (Licensed) – Grand Theft Auto Vice City (PS2)

I defy you to find a better use of licensed music to create a unique and absorbing atmosphere.


The voice of Vice City’s most wanted.

Runner Up – Jet Set Radio Future (Xbox)

Best Voice Work – Grand Theft Auto Vice City (PS2)

Between the cut scenes, the pedestrian comments, the DJs, and the radio ads, Vice City managed to not only come out with the best voice work this year, but a level of perfection only touched by last year’s darling, Grand Theft Auto 3.

Runner Up – Kingdom Hearts (PS2)

Best Sound Effects – MechAssault (Xbox)

Turn your volume all the way up and it almost sounds like a 50-foot tall mech just blew up YOUR house!

Runner Up – Medal of Honor Frontline (Xbox)

Best Use of Voice Chat – SOCOM: U.S. Navy Seals (PS2)

Thanks to the accompanying Logitech headset, SOCOM took team play and cooperation to dizzying new heights.

Runner Up – MechAssault (Xbox)

Special Achievement – WWE Smackdown: Shut Your Mouth (PS2)

For the sound made when hitting someone with a table! Instant classic!

Runner Up – Jedi Knight 2: Jedi Outcast (when will we ever get tired of those classic Star Wars sounds?)

Worst Musical Score – Way of the Samurai (PS2)

Who knew the Japanese invented bad electronica back in the 1800s?

Runner Up -

Worst Music (Licensed) – Madden 2003 (Multi)

Note to EA: Please stop pimping for the record label. Bon Jovi and OK Go is not good background music for a quarterback sack.


Note to Bon Jovi: Stay the hell away from football forever.

Runner Up – Aggressive Inline (Multi)

Worst Voice Work – Shenmue 2 (Xbox)

I don’t know what is worst: the fact that this game has some of the worst voice acting ever heard in a game, or the fact that the horrible voice acting is about the only thing keeping this game from reaching gaming nirvana.

Runner Up – Hitman 2: Stealth Assassin (Multi)

On to the Visual Awards-->

 


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